Humor
Questionable Behavior
“To be, or not to be– That is the question.” As this famous phrase spoken by Prince Hamlet was, in fact, spoken by Hamlet, a man, and not by Ophelia, a woman, there was only one (solitary) question. Were Ophelia to have asked the question, it would have been followed by several other questions, dozens […]
Howl at the Moon
“Where are my pantyhose, Mary?” I hollered across the house to the fiery redhead who’d be my wife, if I’d the balls to marry her. I continued flinging things in a fevered search, waiting for a reply. She never answers when I holler, and doesn’t come when called, but she knows a trick or two, […]
Volume of Life
Life needs volume controls. If you’ve ever had an eight year old, been near an eight year old, or been an eight year old, yourself, you know exactly what I mean. I’ve tried the TV remote, mashing the button, repeatedly, while pointing its blinking red light at the boy, then mashing the button harder, and […]
Poetry is for the birds.
I came upon the good fortune to court a lovely redhead. “Let’s have coffee and krimpets at three”, she said. I replied, “Three is a splendid time for our date. If I spread two and four wide, thereupon, I shall find three, laying juicily in wait– a target in which to thrust arrow deep, I […]
Colorful Character
“You can tell a lot about a fellow’s character by his way of eating jellybeans.” ~Ronald Reagan I eat the red jellybeans first. After all the red jellybeans have been greedily devoured, even if small children must be shoved aside or tricked to secure them all, I then seek the red-derived jellybeans, the pinks, and […]
sad haiku
the gas bill is due I mail them a sad haiku burning bills give warmth
Barking at Shadows
Writing is just talking. There’s nothing to it, really. We all talk, at least sometimes. We all have something to say, at least sometimes. To take it further, we all have something interesting to say, at least once in a while. The rest of the times might just be our own silence, which is just […]
Don’t Say No
In the Eighties, Nancy Reagan coined the phrase, “Just Say No To Drugs.” A shorter version, immortalizing the notion in slogan was, “Just Say No.” The catchy slogan has some value beyond the original intent of helping vulnerable youth find a way to fight peer pressure which might tempt them to try drugs. The concept […]
Twitter Twitterings
In my twitching early-morning compulsion to connect on Social Media, as has been recommended by the swami-hat marketing gurus, I’d decided to look at Twitter again. I never did quite figure it out, and even the name, ‘Twitter’, I find distracting, as it conjures images of restless, squabbling blue birds with no eyes, fluttering out […]
Bushman Phenomenon : Hair Troubles
Hair. Most people have some, if not on their head, then surely elsewhere, although then it becomes a private matter. As my hair became more sparse, partly in response to parenthood, which gives even hair follicles suicidal tendencies, I decided to keep mine short. My thinning hair looks less noticeable now. I look just like […]